I will never ever

Im upset , and mad at the same time . I just dont understand why is he doing this to me ? This is urgent . And yet he could still have thoughts of delaying it as if it is not important . It is a very big deal to me . This is the world to me . I just couldnt believe this . If it is him , i just dont care if he wants to delay it , but it's involving others as well . So , whats the point of me coming back ? Just to hang around when I got a lot of things to do and worry ? I'm  so sorry for all the foul words that I've thrown and about to throw . I just cant take it any longer . I just dont know what else I should do . Beg you ? C'mon , I know you wont need me to beg . Just have some mercy . I'm not ease until I know whats happening . And if anything happens , i certainly won't forgive you for the rest of my life .